QUALITY INTERPERSONAL RELATIONSHIPS

	A quality interpersonal relationship is a relationship which is built on understanding of self and 
others.  A quality interpersonal relationship goes beyound just being casually aquainted with others to 
sharing with and gaining an understanding of one another.  What I mean by sharing with is that you get a 
feeling for each other.  I can empathize with you and see things through your eyes.  When a quality 
interpersonal relationship is present there's certain amount of synergy that takes place between the persons 
involved in the relationship.  A good example of a quality interpersonal relationship could be found within 
the strong family unit.
	If we were to study a family that is close knit what would we see.  We would most likely see the 
following characteristics: individual respect, trust, open lines of communication, open mindedness, 
patience, empathy, love and many other attributes which add up to a strong interpersonal relationship.  
With in a strong family you find people that truely feel for each other.  For example if Mom is sick the 
morale of the other family members goes down.  If Dad gets a promotion the hold family shares the 
feelings of esteem with Dad.  The point I'm trying to make is that in quality interpersonal relationship you 
will start to feel some of things that I feel which allows you to better understand me and communicate with 
me.  Although a quality interpersonal relationship sounds like the best thing since Campbell soup and the 
Gerry-curl it's not a relationship that's easily achieved.
	To achieve a quality interpersonal relationship takes time, effort, desire, understanding, trust, 
disclosure, and feedback, effective communication, and etc.  When we first meet a person we don't 
immediately establish an interpersonal relationship.  As implied in the opening paragraphs, a quality 
interpersonal relationship goes for beyound conducting casual conversation.  It takes time to build an 
interpersonal relationship.  Why?  People like to interact; however, they are protective of there feelings and 
don't immediately open up to let you inside to see who's live there.  What I'm saying is to establish an 
interpersonal relationship with others you need to know things about them and get some perceptiion of how 
they interpret things.  To get this type of understanding about another person takes time.  A good example 
would be the development of a friendship.
	Think of your best friend.  This is probably one of the most productive inpersonal relationships 
that exist for you.  Now go back from the time you met up until now.  How did you get to become such best 
friends?  As you think through the process you find those things that lead you to become best friends are 
the some of the same things that are required to build and interpersonal relationship.  I think the depth or 
even mere existance of an interpersonal relationship hinges on disclosure and feedback.
	Let's talk about the importance of disclosure and feedback in a quality interpersonal relationship.  
First of all let me give credit where credit is do.  My ideas of disclosure and feedback come from the self-
disclosure model developed by Joseph Luft and Harrington Ingham.  The model has become know and 
Johari's window.  The premise of the model is that the more we disclose about ourselves and get feedback 
the more we learn about ourselves and the more others learn about us.  I believe there is a direct tie between 
this theory and how a quality interpersonal relationship is achieved.  When I met the person who is now my 
best friend, I started the relationship with a casual hello, like most people do.  As time passed, I found 
reasons to disclose things about me.  Well guess what happen; as I started to disclose things about me he 
also shared things about him.  As more time passed, we started to give feedback to each other about the 
characteristics and behaviors of each other. !
 The longer relationship lasted and the more we disclosed the more we begin to trust each other.  The more 
trust the more disclosure and feedback.  This continued until we've  developed an inseperable friendship 
and a top quality interpersonal relationship.  So you can see it doesn't happen over night and it takes time 
and risk to build an interpersonal relationship.  The risk comes in when we open ourselves up and share 
some the personal things that could be used to damage us emotionally.  Although a quality interpersonal 
relationship is difficult to develop it more than worth it in evey walks of life, personal and professonal life. 
	My organization is responsible developing curriculum for supervisory and management courses.  
Our job requires the most effective communicataion skills that we could possibly use.  Our customers 
depend on our communication skills.  To give our coustomer a quality product require a lot of interacition 
between those of use in the organization.  The very nature of our business is very stressful because the job 
requires us to be somewhat creative.  We have many think sessions just to figure out which direction to 
take.  At time the emotions run rampant during these think sessions.  Opinions are criticized and feeling are 
crushed.  This is where a quality interpersonal relationship is important.  I beleive we have quality 
intepersonal relationships present in our organization.  So instead of addressing what would happen if they 
were to occur, I'll address what happens due to the presents of the quality interpersonal relationships.
	Our organization is an excellent place to work.  The good Lord blessed me when He assigned me 
to the organization.  The work is challenging but because of the interpersonal relationships you look 
forward to the challenge.  I'm not saying I don't get frustrated or complain but when I do feel this way 
there's someone there that will listen.  The management shows a genuine concern for the workers.  The 
lines of communication are open from top to bottom.  There is know back stabbing and very few negative 
comments about the work ethics of other.  Let me give you example.  There are times that my boss and I 
have major disagreements to the point of raising our voice and getting frustrated to such a time we have to 
call timeout.  You would think that this would cause hard feeling between the two of us on standing bases, 
not so.  The healing process is quick and we have one of the best boss to subordinate relationships I've 
seen.  It's not just like that with me but with all of us tha!
t have been assigned for over six months or so.  I say six months or so because it takes that long to get use 
to each other.  Another major plus is all of us are able to discuss what's on our minds with out fear of 
retribution.  There's a lot of trust between each of us.  All of these things are a result of the strong 
interpersonal relationships that exist in the organiazation.